A Filipino American's new life
“In the end, you always go back to the people that were there in the beginning.” “Sometimes, even when you’re having a good time, you can’t help but stop and think about how much you enjoy the time with your friends.”
So, here we are; she got a doll in a buggy. She said, “Nanay, I want to take the baby for a walk” but she let go of the buggy with the doll in prompting it to roll down the hill.
Should I be surprised, be upset or just ignore the changes? Perplexed as I was I knew I did not want to go down the road to destruction.
Surprise! I did not realize we were all wearing yellow today. Was there a memo? I just thought I'd wear my yellow turtleneck top today which my husband got me for Christmas. When we left the house to meet my friend in town I grabbed my little girl's yellow coat. Lo and behold when we …
Am I trapped in a world of in between? Who am I really?' I still say I am more like an American but then again I am not there, I do not live there anymore, and for some reason I cannot be like an American here in England just because... so, maybe I am an in between? Or maybe hybrid of the two?
While I am excited to see my baby and hold him/her in my arms, my worry now is the pain of giving birth and my capability as a mother. I'm questioning myself. Can I do it? Will I be good enough? I realized that I have not fully accepted motherhood. My mind is still all over the place and I am afraid that I won't be able to perform my duty if I still keep thinking about my career and the things that I still want to do. Since I have been given this opportunity to be a mother, then I think I should be a mother first.
I could not believe my belly has grown so much! It looks like I just swallowed a watermelon! I am now on week 40, and I feel very heavy now. I can barely walk. I am due in 3 days but the midwife told me they will induce me before my due date. I really feel like my belly is like a water balloon and according to whattoexpect.com the size of my belly now is the size of a small pumpkin!
It’s been twenty years already but it still feels just like yesterday. While New Year’s eve used to be an occasion for a fun party, the night of December 31st became instead a moment to remember dad’s death – and to celebrate his life. He only lasted 10 hours after the heart attack began, and his last words were “Into thy hands I commend my spirit." He said he wanted to go home, and at 10pm, he did.
I did not see any brown skin, Pacific Islanders or Asian staff member at the hospital that we went to on my first appointment with my midwife. Although I already know that this is a heavily white British populated area, I still thought I would see a few Filipino nurses, but there weren't any.
It's pretty hilarious to see that all politicians anywhere in the world they all have the same strategy; it's either holding fish or carrying babies. I notice that the undecided here in the U.K. are pretty much the same in the US. A lot of their concerns stem from being uninformed. In reality their concerns are already addressed in the party manifestos.
Effe moves to the UK 